Never fails

Sometimes it feels that no matter what I do, it's not right.

Luckily I know that this is normal, so I'm gonna try not to beat myself up to much.

Life is such a challenge. Day by day you just gotta try to make it.

The challenges come from all sides.

Lately I'm feeling like it's near impossible to be a good parent. No matter what I do, someone is complaining, someone is falling apart, someone has issues. Frankly I'm exhausted.

I'm trying to be what/who I need to be to everyone.....it's absolutely not working. 

I say this as my oldest walks out of the house mad at me to go to a church function cause her dad is driving her instead of me, never mind she's been literally hanging on me for the last few hours and she's wearing new shorts (with, leggings, it's winter people!) that she told me she needed so I immediately found the money to buy her.

My nephew has been putting me through absolute hell, screaming, fits, growling, punching things. He's close to being reunited with his mother permanently and I'm the one that has to pay for his fears. Oh did I mention that my niece told me her mom wants to "get me in trouble"? Granted she lies a lot and has issues, but still, to even say that. I have given up so much of my world, my family's world, to help these kids and now their mother (who is my sister) wants me to feel more pain? Does she not even remotely understand what all I've taken on for her and those kids?!?!

I feel like I'm going to start rambling so I'm going to let it go there. I've got some "mommy juice" going so I'm just gonna stop there.

I feel like I have no right to complain. My life is difficult cause I've chosen to take on a lot, I feel like I'm in the spot God wants me to be, I just don't like it. I want to be able to walk away, but I know God isn't going to allow it. I have a feeling my life is going to get a whole lot tougher and I just need to accept His plans for it and let go. Letting go has always been my challenge.....